Schlegel's was a Rexall franchised drug store chain in the Quad Cities. One was located a few blocks away from where we lived in Moline. The pharmacist/manager there was a younger guy, probably in his mid 20s, who had a rather spontaneous and odd sense of humor; the kids today call it "random."
Early one afternoon, I was in the store to get a candy bar. The woman who worked the cash register was at lunch, and the pharmacist waved me back to the pharmacy counter. An older woman, Mrs. Bates, was at the counter. Mrs. Bates was hard of hearing, a fact that she alternately affirmed and denied, as it suited her purposes. I arrived just in time to hear her ask:
"Is this drug safe?" she asked the pharmacist.
I could see a twinkle in the man's eyes, and I soon found out why. "No," he said in a low voice, "we're doing our part to reverse the population explosion."
He'd said that quietly enough for Mrs. Bates to not be able to hear it. I heard it clearly enough though, and I giggled. Fortunately, I was standing out of Mrs. Bates's view, and I had enough sense even then to know that it would be a good idea if she didn't know I was there. I moved a bit more behind her.
"What's that, young man?" she insisted. "You know I don't hear very well!"
"It's not safe," the pharmacist continued, "but we have plenty of other drugs that will take care of whatever problems it may cause."
This struck me as even funnier, and the giggle fit continued, fortunately in a low enough tone to avoid being detected by Mrs. Bates.
"Eh?" Mrs. Bates prompted.
The pharmacist raised his voice: "WE'VE NEVER HAD A COMPLAINT FROM ANYBODY WHO'S USED IT," he shouted in a voice probably loud enough to be heard next door at Oz's Clip Joint, a barber shop about 100 feet away. He then added, in the low voice: "God rest their souls."
"Well you don't have to shout!" Mrs. Bates scolded the man. "I'm not deaf, you know!"
Early one afternoon, I was in the store to get a candy bar. The woman who worked the cash register was at lunch, and the pharmacist waved me back to the pharmacy counter. An older woman, Mrs. Bates, was at the counter. Mrs. Bates was hard of hearing, a fact that she alternately affirmed and denied, as it suited her purposes. I arrived just in time to hear her ask:
"Is this drug safe?" she asked the pharmacist.
I could see a twinkle in the man's eyes, and I soon found out why. "No," he said in a low voice, "we're doing our part to reverse the population explosion."
He'd said that quietly enough for Mrs. Bates to not be able to hear it. I heard it clearly enough though, and I giggled. Fortunately, I was standing out of Mrs. Bates's view, and I had enough sense even then to know that it would be a good idea if she didn't know I was there. I moved a bit more behind her.
"What's that, young man?" she insisted. "You know I don't hear very well!"
"It's not safe," the pharmacist continued, "but we have plenty of other drugs that will take care of whatever problems it may cause."
This struck me as even funnier, and the giggle fit continued, fortunately in a low enough tone to avoid being detected by Mrs. Bates.
"Eh?" Mrs. Bates prompted.
The pharmacist raised his voice: "WE'VE NEVER HAD A COMPLAINT FROM ANYBODY WHO'S USED IT," he shouted in a voice probably loud enough to be heard next door at Oz's Clip Joint, a barber shop about 100 feet away. He then added, in the low voice: "God rest their souls."
"Well you don't have to shout!" Mrs. Bates scolded the man. "I'm not deaf, you know!"
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